It's been a while and I know I've been waiting. Waiting for that drop of blood to fall flat on a surface and splatter.
I have been dry, yet in my mind it's monsoon and I don't know why, my throat constricts around those words that seemed so easy to spit out once a long time ago.
They make me doubt myself, my faith, MY belief and then what I'm left alone with, to try and discover is what kind of life has been left for me?
The other day I came to a strange realisation, most relationships between male/female are a constant struggle; power, submission, forgiveness, blame, strength, weakness... all conflicting emotions of who's on top.
And you know what God dammit I'm gonna say it - the only time a man wants a woman on top is horizontally. Because otherwise noooooooo it might show him weak, noooooo he might seem less of a man if he admitted to an opinion opposing his.
Oh God I have become bitter. I need to feel again. I have become habituated to certain people and things - simple attachments with no emotions other than empathy, care & at times pity or frustration.
the only time a man wants a woman on top is horizontally
ReplyDeleteHonestly - there are men out there who are secure enough in their own selves and their own masculinity that they don't care who calls the shots in a particular situation. They may be rare, but they are out there. They often tend to be men who had intelligent and educated mothers and sisters.
very interesting poem/post.
ReplyDeletemind you about the woman-on-top-horiz issue.. i feel very comfortable to have a woman boss above me.. actually my first post-uni job was working under a woman and till now i consider her my mentor. she has such a clear mind even with all the busy things around her and ALWAYS has a spare minute if I want to ask her a question. For that I respect her a lot.
Back to the issue of a woman on top.. well.. like i said i am comfortable with that, and the main reason (sadly) is that for that woman to get there she probably had to work harder than 10 guys put together, and hence it becomes a pleasure to work for her.